There is a strange phenomenon that I’ve found somewhat consistent in many stories that involve humans being around other sentient beings. If a romance is involved, the gender of the non-human is usually the opposite to that of the writer. We see this in many stories, including but not limited to…
Lord of the Rings
City of Angels
True Blood
Magnifica (Yes, I’m guilty of it too.)
Hrolf Kraki Saga (Skuld’s Parents)

Now why does this happen? My wife suggested that it’s because I have some kind of elf fetish. It has also been suggested that If she had pointed, it wouldn’t have been 6 years before I asked her out… BUT this isn’t about me, so we’re moving on!

It is, however a good question to ask. Is the reason that this happens because of a subconscious… or not-so-subconscious desire to have a relationship like that?
Maybe… I won’t deny that I’ve seen examples where that could be the case… (50 Shades of Gray, the original version). Honestly though, I think in many cases it happens because the writer is trying to explore different nuances of the cultural and philosophical differences that would cause roadblocks in such a relationship. That is a lot easier to do when the human character is the author’s gender. That way, they’re not under pressure to try to make that character’s perspective believable when the only experience that they have is 3rd party.

So which is it? Well I think it depends on the writer. I can’t speak for others. Do both happen sure, but I’d like to think, based on my readings, that the latter is true.

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